|
Breaking through the barriers: addressing unhelpful beliefs .
Find yourself ‘stuck’ in a situation that you just can’t get yourself out of? Have you considered that perhaps the underlying beliefs you have about yourself and the situation may be keeping you locked in this negative cycle?
Beliefs are essentially generalisations, judgements, and evaluations that we have about ourselves, others, and the world around us. Beliefs directly affect your thoughts and feelings, which then directly affect our behaviour and the actions we take toward our goals. Now, sometimes our beliefs do not support us in achieving our goals as they are unproductive or unhelpful, thus causing negative thoughts and negative feelings, which impacts negatively on our behaviour and ultimately causes an unproductive and often unwanted outcome..
As a career coach I’ve had many clients who have found themselves stuck in a vicious cycle because of limiting beliefs. Do you have any limiting beliefs blocking you from reaching your goals or achieving real success?.
When I think of limiting beliefs I compare it to a ‘thought’ virus. Just like a computer virus a ‘thought’ virus can cause immense destruction if you let it. Like a virus, our limiting beliefs are a self-fulfilling prophecy that interferes with our ability to heal, improve, and achieve the dreams and goals we want for ourselves.
To give you an example of how powerful our beliefs are, and how they can impact our outcomes and results, we’re going to review two scenarios.
Imagine a person having the following unhelpful beliefs:
-
I’m not good at selling myself
-
I don’t really have any real impressive accomplishments in my
career
-
I haven’t got the skills to support me in making a transition
to a new role
-
I’m too old for a career change - I’m too old to go back to
study
-
I’ll never be able to find a job that I really love .
Let’s look at the impact these unhelpful beliefs could have when this person attends an interview:
Belief: “I’m not very talented and don’t
really have any hope of getting through the
interview or being offered the job.”
Why bother to research the company and practice my interview techniques?
I just know the other candidates are going to have far more experience than me. I know I’m going to make a fool of myself.
I feel so hopeless and uninterested in preparing for the interview.
I don’t perform well at all in the interview.
I notice when I answer a question incorrectly (which makes me even more nervous and incapable of answering any further questions appropriately).
I ruin all chances of impressing the interviewer.
I receive a ‘you were not successful’ letter in the mail.
I confirm and prove my belief to myself, which is:
Belief: “I’m not very talented and don’t really have any hope of getting through the interview or being offered the job.”
So you can see that this person’s limiting beliefs became a self-fulfilling prophecy that interfered with their ability to prepare and present themselves professionally at the interview, unfortunately confirming their unhelpful belief to themselves that “they are not talented and have no real hope of getting through the interview”.
I’m sure we have all heard about the movie ‘The Secret’, which is based on a very important principle that NLP states which is: ‘where your attention goes your energy flows’. In other words, what you focus your attention and energy on is what you will attract into your life. Now if we look at the above situation, that person’s attention is focused primarily on the negative which therefore created and delivered a negative outcome for the client. They went full circle to create exactly what they ‘had [unfortunately] believed’.
If we take the exact same job seeker but change the limiting beliefs to more positive and empowering beliefs, let’s see what impact that would have on the sequence of events.
Belief: “I am skilled, have a lot to offer an employer, so have a great chance of getting through the interview and being offered the job.”
I research the company and practise my interview techniques.
I visualise myself building rapport with the interviewer and being able to answer all their questions professionally.
I feel confident and ready to meet the interviewer.
I connect instantly with the interviewer and respond well to the questions.
I notice when I impress the interviewer with my responses.
I strengthen my position as a strong candidate for the role.
I have been invited to the next round of interviews.
I confirm and prove my belief to myself, that:
Belief: “I am skilled, have a lot to offer an employer, so have a great chance of getting through the interview.”
What an impact this has on this person’s job search and interview. Simply by changing the belief and their attention in a positive way their energy, thoughts, and actions were all positive allowing for a far more positive outcome.
Do you have any unhelpful and limiting beliefs that are currently holding you back from achieving the goals that you would like to change?
Maybe you find yourself continuously failing to make it to the second stage in your interviews and are feeling quite hopeless and unable to pinpoint exactly why this is? You may have considered changing jobs for some time, however feel apprehensive about submitting a job application because you doubt your skills and experience? Perhaps you may be feeling unworthy of putting yourself forward for that promotion – how could you compete with everyone else in your department?
If you can relate to this and are ready to break through those unhelpful beliefs and barriers, it would be an honour to work with you.
My email is:
annemarie@annemariecross.com
Have a great fortnight everyone!
To your success!
Annemarie |
A personal note from Annemarie...
Not
subscribed yet?
